A Patchwork Fantasy Tale in eight parts.

Our eighth visit to Hotel Olympus, during which a new normal is established.

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Transcript

[Upbeat, inquisitive music]

Laura: Hi, you can call me Laura. I’m here to tell you a story if you like. This is Patchwork Fairy Tales and today we’re visiting Hotel Olympus. If you want to read as well as listen, check out the transcript linked in the description.

[Music fades]

Hotel Olympus Epilogue

Well, it wasn’t every day you found out you were working in an extension of hell — Charlie was by now well aware that Hades wasn’t hell, but she retained the right to continue to privately call it whatever she liked — but in the end it did not matter all that much. Once she had recovered from the initial shock all she had had to do was accept that apart from none of the guests being human, none of her co-workers were either. Well, no longer mortal at least.

It didn’t change her day-to-day too much. Whether Cassandra was just an exceptionally organized receptionist or a clairvoyant had no effect on either her job or their friendship. And the fact that Marsyas actually did have hooves, instead of very clunky boots, could hardly have any impact either. The only thing Charlie had resolved on was her suggestion to Echo that they both learn sign language, which she very enthusiastically accepted, but they were both so busy that would probably take a while.

So, no, when she requested a talk with her manager it wasn’t to resign, as he had feared.

“Of course not, chief,” she smiled. (He had explained that neither the name Damastes, nor Procrustes really suited him any longer and he had not yet found another one.) “What do you take me for? As long as the working conditions are good I am more than willing to work in an outpost of hell.”

He was clearly too relieved to argue with her about semantics.

“But that’s what I wanted to talk to you about,” she continued. “Working conditions.” She fixed him with a determined expression. “We need more front of house staff. Specifically, I need someone to train to do at least part of my job, especially when I can’t be here.”

“Ah, well,” the manager said. “I am sure that will not be a problem. Provided, perhaps—” His broad shoulders stiffened a little. “You could possibly conduct the recruitment process personally…”

Charlie thought back to her own job interview and kept her face carefully neutral. “Of course, sir, if you think that is best. And I do have some thoughts on that point,” she immediately added.

The manager actually smiled. “By all means.”

“Normally I would never say this, but, don’t get someone from hospitality.” She gave him a pressing look. “I’d say customer service experience desired, but the required education should be a classics degree.”

If she was going to ever get all the nonsense in this hotel under control she really needed some help. And if her help knew about the Ancient Greek nonsense, she could teach them about the hotel nonsense.

“A…classics degree,” the manager repeated, writing it down. “I have never heard of this.”

“No need to look it up,” Charlie said. “But trust me, it’s going to make a world of difference.”

He nodded. “As long as it means your continued employment.”

She smiled. “Oh I don’t intend on leaving.” Hotel Olympus was her hotel.

Dramatis Personae

The staff of Hotel Olympus, as told by Charlie, human (after she’s had her caffeine), tired front of house manager, and wholly uninterested in Greek mythology:

• “Mister P.“, general manager. No one calls him by his full name, usually it’s just “sir” and “chief”. Looks big and strong enough to lift a barn.
  
  
• Cassandra, receptionist, seems to have an uncanny ability to know what’s needed in the hotel before the guests even make a reservation. Weird around Apollo.
  
  
• Echo, head of housekeeping. Doesn’t talk much, but clearly an excellent listener, never fails to repeat back instructions.
  
  
• Phaëton, valet parking. A bit too fond of speeding, but a very eager driver and takes excellent care of the chariots.
  
  
• Tantalus, head chef. Runs a very orderly kitchen. Clearly very passionate about food, but hates preparing roast meat.
  
  
• Sisyphus, head of the legal department. Not that there seems to be anyone else working there. But every single permit is always in order and the employee contracts are rock solid, so whatever.
  
  
• Marsyas, runs the stables. He’s not very polite, but always cheerful, and takes very good care of all the ridiculous animals the guests have pulling their chariots. Walks kind of strangely. Also weird around Apollo.
  
  
• Icarus, seems to be around solely to fix stuff. His dad allegedly built this place and if anything gets lost or broken, Icarus always seems to know how to restore it. Has some trouble focussing.
  
  
• Ganymedes, head waiter in the restaurant. Talks to the guests as if he knows them personally. Keeps calling his job an internship and looks young enough for it to be true, but is clearly working fulltime.
  
  
• Autolycus, officially head of room service, unofficially the one person able to find every single ridiculous thing the guests might request. A bit of a sweet-talker. Chummy with Hermes.
  
  
• Argus, the doorman. Big guy. Usually wearing a bulky coat with the collar turned up and keeps his head covered too. Not a fan Hermes, but especially cordial towards Hera the rare times she visits.

[Upbeat, inquisitive music returns]

Laura: Thank you very much for listening, I really hope you liked this multi-chapter story told over several episodes. If you have any feedback about the podcast please go over to laurasimons.com or to laurasimonsdaughter at Tumblr to tell me all about it. Meanwhile I’ll keep dreaming up different stories to tell you guys.

There’s another tale to tell some other day, but until then: remember to mind your mythology, guard your name, and be safe.

[Music fades]

_{Copyright Laura Simons, please do not copy my stories without my permission, lest you insult the fae.}